This weekend has been busy with a capital B. Or maybe it's just me that's been busy. Friday night Mr. Sleep Regression didn't go to bed until midnight, and that's why I missed blogging Friday - can't wait until he goes to bed to do anything lately! Then I worked at the group home (did you know I worked at a group home? I do! I've been there 7 years now, but I only work 1-2x a month right now.) Anyways, I got home, nursed Kieran for about 2 hours straight (ahh, gotta love the cluster feeding) but he went down at 11pm this time - an hour improvement over Friday night! So we're getting there. He is harder to put down to sleep but sleeps very well once he's down for the count, so that's actually nice. We'll see what he does tonight! The sleep regression will end someday, right?
I have school this afternoon so I've got to get back to doing some reading before I go, but I wanted to share this poem that two of my preemie mom friends have shared with me. It makes me tear up a little each time I read it.
How Preemie Moms Are Chosen
(Adapted from Erma Bombeck)
Did you ever wonder how the mothers of premature babies are chosen?
Somehow, I visualize God hovering over Earth, selecting his instruments
for propagation with great care and deliberation.
As he observes, he instructs his angels to take notes in a giant ledger.
"Beth Armstrong, son. Patron Saint, Matthew. Marjorie Forrest, daughter.
Patron Saint, Celia. Carrie Rutledge, twins. Patron Saint ... give her Gerard.
He's used to profanity."
Finally, he passes a name to an angel and smiles. "Give her a preemie."
The angel is curious. "Why this one, God? She's so happy."
"Exactly," smiles God. "Could I give a premature baby a mother who knows no laughter?
That would be cruel." "But does she have the patience?" asks the angel.
"I don't want her to have too much patience, or she'll drown in a sea of self-pity and despair. Once the shock and resentment wear off, she'll handle it.
I watched her today.
She has that sense of self and independence so rare and so necessary in a mother.
You see, the child I'm going to give her has a world of its own.
She has to make it live in her world, and that's not going to be easy."
"But Lord, I don't think she even believes in you."
God smiles. "No matter, I can fix that. This one is perfect.
She has just the right amount of selfishness."
The angel gasps, "Selfishness?! Is that a virtue?"
God nods. "If she can't separate herself from the child occasionally, she will never survive.
Yes, here is a woman whom I will bless with a child less than perfect.
She doesn't know it yet, but she is to be envied.
She will never take for granted a spoken word.
She will never consider a step ordinary.
When her child says 'mama' for the first time, she will be witness to a miracle and know it.
I will permit her to see clearly the things I see – ignorance, cruelty, prejudice – and allow her to rise above them.
She will never be alone.
I will be at her side every minute of every day of her life because she is doing my work as surely as she is here by my side."
"And what about her Patron Saint?" asks the angel, his pen poised in the air.
God smiles. "A mirror will suffice."